The best animal jokes

Chuck Norris doesn’t ride a horse, he uses his crotch to carry it.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
The mommy Cobra with her little son are taking a “walk”. The little cobra asks; "Mommy, are we poisonous?" "Yes, we are. Why you ask?" The little cobra asks again; "Are you sure that we’re poisonous?" "Yes I am!" says the mom with pride. The little one asks again; "Are you very very sure that we’re very poisonous?" "Damn sure! We’re the most poisonous snakes in the whole world! But why you ask?" The little cobra burst into tears; "Cause I bit my tongue a bit before!"
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
One afternoon I was walking on a trail with my baby daughter, chatting to her about the scenery. When a man and his dog approached, I leaned down to the carriage and said, “See the doggy?” Suddenly I felt foolish talking to my baby as if she understood me. However, just as the man passed, he reached down, patted his dog, and said, “See the baby?”
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, dog
Q: What do you get if you cross a bear with a toilet? A: Winnie the Pooh.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting
Did you hear about the pub owner who raised a baby rabbit? It was an inn-grown hare.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
How do you make a rabbit fast? Don't feed it.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast. They taste like chicken.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
What's wet and wiggly and says how do you do sixteen times? Two octopuses shaking hands.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris doesn't get shark attacked, the shark gets Chuck Norris attacked.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
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