The best animal jokes

Rabbit: "Are you sure this bottle of special carrot juice will cure me?" Doctor: "Absolutely. No rabbit ever came back for another."
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, doctor, food
What does an octopus wear on a cold day? A coat of arms.
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, weather
Yo Mamma so stupid she put on bug spray before she goes to the flee market!
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has 63.63 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: animal, insulting, stupid, Yo mama
Chuck Norris looked Medusa straight in the eyes, and laughed.
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has 63.51 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.
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has 63.49 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
I was walking home last night when I noticed an old drunk staggering along the road. He passed a woman who was walking a young child. "Lady", said the drunk, "that's the ugliest kid I've ever seen. Damn, that is one ugly child!." As the drunk wandered off, the lady burst into tears. Just then, a mailman came to her rescue. "What's the matter, madam?" he asked. "I've just been horribly insulted" she sobbed. "There there," said the mailman, reaching into his pocket. "Dry your eyes with this tissue, and here's a banana for the chimp"
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has 63.45 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, food, kids, ugly
I feel like every nature documentary is directed by a psychopath. "Here's the cutest baby animal ever." "Now let's watch something eat it."
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has 63.40 % from 288 votes. More jokes about: animal, dead baby, death
What is a nigger? Proof that skunks fuck monkeys.
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has 63.40 % from 404 votes. More jokes about: animal, black people
Why did the cow jump over the moon? To get to the Milky Way!
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has 63.22 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal, travel
Q: What is a turkey's favorite dessert? A: Peach gobbler.
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has 63.22 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal, geography, Thanksgiving
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