How do you start a teddy bear race? Ready, teddy, go.
Two cows are standing in a field. One says to the other "Are you worried about Mad Cow Disease?" The other one says "No, It doesn't worry me, I'm a horse!"
Q: What is a black cat's favorite color? A: Purrrrrr-ple!
How do you hire a horse? Put a brick under each hoof!
Mother to little boy: ‘Stop pulling the cat’s tail.’ Boy: ‘I’m not. I’m just holding it. It’s the cat that’s doing the pulling.’
One day two boys were walking through the woods when they saw some rabbit turds. One of the boys said, "What is that?" "They're smart pills," said the other boy. "Eat them and they'll make you smarter." So he ate them and said, "These taste like crap." "See," said the other boy, "you're getting smarter already."
What did the calf say to the silo? "Is my fodder in there?"
What do cows get when they do all their chores? Mooney.
What is a moo hoo for steak that came late? Filet delay.
What do you call a cow on the barnyard floor? Ground Beef.