Q: What do you call a car only British animals can drive?
A: OxFord.
Q: Which side of a deer has the most meat?
A: The inside.
What dog can jump higher than a building?
Anydog, buildings can't jump!
What do a rattlesnake and a soft penis have in common?
You can't f**k with either one.
Yo momma is so hairy when she lifts her armpit up it looks like she's got Bigfoot in a headlock.
Q:Where do you find a dog with no legs?
A:Right where you left him.
A man was driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back seat.
The police stop him and say that he can’t drive around with the penguins in the car and should take them to the zoo.
The man agrees and drives off.
The next day the same man is driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back and again.
He is stopped by the same police officer who says, "Hey! I though I told you to take those to the zoo."
The man replies "I did. Today I’m taking them to the movies."
What do you get if you cross a zebra with an ape man?
Tarzan stripes forever.
How much money did the bronco have?
Only a buck!
We must admit that we want to be like some animals.
We all want to be strong like a bear, we want to have a sharp sight like a falcon, the intelligence like an owl, the endurance like a horse, we want to sing like a skylark, we want to be running like a fox and of course we all want to have the salivas like a dragon lizard.