Q: How do you know Noah was a White man? A: No nigger could stay on a boat for 40 days without eating the chickens!
What do you call an owl magician? HOOOOOdini.
How do you know when a crab is drunk? It walks forwards.
Why is it that if you give a child an encyclopedia, lawyer is always the third thing they look up? Because the first thing a child looks up is dog. The second is snake. And under snake, the encyclopedia says See Lawyer.
A tourist on a farm asked the farmer why one pig had a wooden leg. The farmer said, "That pig is the bravest pig I ever saw." "So why does he have a wooden leg?" the tourist asked. "One night, our house caught on fire, and he came inside and woke us all up." The tourist asked again, "So, why does that pig have a wooden leg?" "You can't eat a pig that brave all at once!"
What do you call a deer with no eyes? I have no I-Deer.
What's a cow's favorite moosical note? Beef-flat!
Where does a cow stop to drink? The milky way.
What game do little cows like to play? Moonopoly.
What do you call a flying skunk? A smellicopter.