The best blonde jokes

Q: What do blondes eat to increase their breast size? A: Silicone chips.
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: beauty, blonde, food, stupid
I wonder what happened to that dumb blonde I went out with. I dyed my hair!
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: beauty, blonde, life, stupid
A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country. After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought, "Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!" She got out and walked over to the farmer and said, "If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?" The farmer, being a bit of a gambler himself, said she could have a try. The blonde looked at the flock and guessed, "157." The farmer was amazed - she was right! So the blonde, (who looked like a brunette), picked one out and got back into her car. Before she left, farmer walked up to her and said. "If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?"
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has 56.36 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, math
At work, a blonde notices her that cubicle mate has a thermos. She asks him what it's for, and he responds, "It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold." The blonde immediately buys one. The next day, she goes to work and proudly displays it. Her cube mate asks, "What do you have in it?" The blonde says, "Soup and ice cream."
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has 56.05 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: blonde, food, work
Q: Why do Blondes always smile during lightning storms? A: They think their picture is being taken.
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has 55.71 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: blonde
In a fancy Paris restaurant, there is a magical wish-granting mirror. But it only grants wishes if you tell the truth if you lie, you disappear. One day, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead enter the restaurant and decide to try out the mirror. The brunette goes first. "I think I'm the smartest woman on earth." "POOF!" She disappears. The redhead goes up to try. "I think I'm the prettiest woman on earth." "POOF!" She disappears. The blonde goes up. "I think..." "POOF!"
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has 55.71 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: blonde
There was this nouveau riche blond girl, who went to the nearest Mercedes showroom with a pocketful of dollars, and came out with the latest model. Half an hour later she was back at the showroom, claiming a that the car they sold her was terrible, that she was disappointed a brand-new Mercedes would get a fault in the gearbox after 15 minutes. The management apologized and gave her a new car. Again, after half an hour she came back. The management offered her a new car, but sent along one of their engineers to see if they could figure out what the problem was. She put in the first gear...speed up...put in second...third...fourth...fifth... “And now,” she said, “for the rocket,” and threw it in reverse.
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has 55.71 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: blonde, management
Q: What do you call a blonde at a golf course? A: The 19th hole.
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has 55.37 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: blonde, dirty, golf
What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? I wonder if it's mine.
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has 55.34 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: blonde
How many blonde does it take to change a lightbulb? A: 3. One to hold the lightbulb and two to turn the ladder.
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has 55.19 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: blonde, light bulb
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