When Chuck Norris works out, he doesn't sweat.
His body cries.
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It is a fact that Chuck Norris cannot cry, this is because his tearducts are too muscular.
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Chuck Norris cut his scissors using his hair.
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The results of a recent Harris Poll on "what's scarier" forced the Discovery channel to cancel Shark week in lieu of Chuck Norris week.
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Chuck Norris doesn't give warnings. He doesn't have to, you should already know.
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Chuck Norris tells his GPS when he wants to turn.
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You know "The Matrix" that was Chuck Norris' very first dream.
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Never ask Chuck Norris for an autograph.
Why?
Because Chuck's signature is a straight roundhouse kick to the face.
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When Chuck Norris gets angry, forests explode from their own boiling sap.
When Chuck Norris laughs, flowers bloom and butterflies hatch.
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Charlie Sheen winning?
Chuck Norris says "I think not."
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