The best Chuck Norris jokes

If Chuck were in the movie Nightmare On Elm Street then it would be renamed nightmare on Chuck Norris Street, cuz nobody dared to get near him.
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Chuck Norris never actually roundhouse kicks anyone, the world just spins underneath him when he lifts his legs.
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Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
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When Chuck Norris was born he drove his mom home from the hospital.
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Some say Chuck once sneezed a rhino inside out.
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Chuck Norris is why we don't need no stinking badgers.
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Chuck Norris doesn't run out of patience, patience runs out of him from fear of a roundhouse kick to the face.
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When Chuck Norris wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska.
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Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.
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Chuck Norris goes on Jeopardy and doesn't answer in the form of a question.
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