Chuck Norris is not 70 years old. At age 60, he began getting younger. This is why he is actually only 50.
Chuck Norris is so powerful he can jumpstart a car by attaching the cables to his chest hair.
Chuck Norris reads with his eyes closed.
When Chuck Norris steals a car he forces it to start.
Chuck Norris can play PS3 games - on PS1
Ali Baba said "Open sesame" to open the secret entrance to the treasure, but little did he know that saying "Open Chuck Norris" opens all doors.
Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
Chuck Norris doesn't need oxygen tanks when scuba diving. He simply sucks all the life out of the ocean to breath.
There are no comets. Only people that Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked so hard that they are now in permanent orbit in our solar system.
Law of Gravity doesn't apply to Chuck Norris, he enforces it... with a round house kick.