Chuck Norris tells clocks what time it is.
Chuck Norris can suck a black hole.
The supreme court issued a ban not allowing Chuck Norris to flex his muscles, for fear of public safety.
Chuck Norris once won a staredown over a walkie talkie.
Chuck Norris can pick "side" when flipping a coin.
Chuck Norris is the reason there is wind. The air tries to get away from him as fast as possible.
Chuck Norris's favourite drink is diamond juice, which he squeezes out of raw diamonds with his bare hands.
The results of a recent Harris Poll on "what's scarier" forced the Discovery channel to cancel Shark week in lieu of Chuck Norris week.
Chuck Norris brings his fists to gunfights.
When Chuck Norris has your back you aren't likely to get it back again.