Chuck Norris once taught a book to read.
Chuck Norris doesn't always drink beer, but when he does he has the dos equis guy serve it to him in a dress.
Chuck Norris has a six-pack on his chin.
Chuck Norris eats rainbows to taste the Skittles.
Chuck Norris was supposed to play the lead role in Mission: Impossible. He was replaced by Tom Cruise because the tittle wouldn't make any sense.
If Chuck Norris were a substance, he would abuse you.
Chuck Norris CAN handle the truth.
Chuck Norris doesn't do steroids, steroids do Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris went up the creek without a paddle... or a canoe.
When Chuck Norris rides into the sunset, the sun is actually running from him.