The best Chuck Norris jokes

The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
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Chuck Norris can eat food while his mouth is closed.
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There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
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There are no weapons of mass destruction. Just Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people. He walks through them
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When cops pull Chuck Norris over, THEY try to talk THEIR way out of it.
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Chuck Norris once was pulled over by a policeman for speeding. Chuck gave him a warning.
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Chuck Norris doesn't do his taxes.....he just sends a blank tax form with his picture on it.
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Santa Clause, The Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy were all real at one time... then they met Chuck. There can only be 1 living legend.
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Chuck Norris decided 50 years of Micheal Jackson was enough
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