If Chuck Norris was in Lord of the Rings, he wouldn't need to take it to Mount Doom, he would destroy it with one roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris can infect a mac with pc viruses.
Rudolph has a red nose because he got lippy and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him across the face several times.
When Chuck Norris watches TV it changes the channel for him when he asks just out of fear.
The names 'Adam and Eve' were simply coverups. They were really Chuck and Norris.
Chuck Norris can sink a hole in none!
When Chuck Norris was a kid he saw a fat chick, he roundhouse kicked her so hard she transformed. She is now known as Britney Spears.
Ed and Lorraine Warren have the doll Anabelle locked in a glass case in their basement, a priest comes there every week to whisper Chuck Norris's name in its ear. The doll locked itself in the case upon first hearing the name.
If you stab Chuck Norris, your knife will bleed.
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over thePacific Ocean.