Chuck Norris never suffers from a heart attack. His heart is too smart to not attack him.
Chuck Norris can eat soup with a fork.
PlayStation network was never hacked. Chuck Norris just decided to play one day.
Chuck Norris dropped an apple once, and gravity was born.
Santa Clause doesn't watch you sleep but Chuck Norris does.
Chuck Norris can win a game of 'Connect 4' in 3 turns.
Chuck Norris can headbutt himself in the face.
No man can perfectly predict the weather, not even Chuck Norris. But the weather DOES try to predict what kind of day Chuck would like to have...
The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Chuck Norris in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.
Chuck Norris doesn't need to mow his lawn, He dares the grass to grow.