The best Chuck Norris jokes

Alien from "A.V.P" is just Chuck Norris' Gecko.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
In Radiant Spirits, Solari's body temprature is 120 degrees. Chuck Norris's body temprature is about 151 degrees.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris doesn't have an ESC key on his computer, no one ever escapes.
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once shook a pirates hand. That pirate is now known as Captain Hook
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, pirate
Chuck Norris said "come on" and "on" came.
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks, physics decides to shut up.
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math
If Chuck Norris were a cat he would have ten lives.
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, Chuck Norris
Sometimes when Chuck Norris stares at the stars too long they get scared. These are known as black holes.
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, science, time
Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and as he enters, notices a horse and the end of the bar with a sign on it. Out of curiosity, he approaches the bartender and asks what the deal is with the horse at the end of the bar. The bartender tells him: "The sign says if you can make the horse laugh you'll win $50. Take note though that hundreds of people have tried and no-one has been able to do it." "Get out the money," says Chuck," I'll be right back." So he walks to the end of the bar, whispers something into the horse's ear, and within seconds the horse is laughing hysterically. "That's amazing," said the bartender. "Tell you what, if you can make him cry I'll double your winnings." "Get out the money," says Chuck," I'll be right back." So Chuck walked again over to the horse, came back to the bartender 2 minutes later, and the horse was balling and sobbing like a baby. "Well," replied Chuck Norris, "First I told him a had a bigger d*ck than he did. Then I showed him."
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has 64.72 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, Chuck Norris
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