If Chuck Norris ever got caught for speeding, he'd let the cops off with a warning.
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Chuck Norris doesn't wear flowers in his hair when he goes to San Francisco, he wears poison ivy.
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Chuck Norris knows what Willis is talkin' bout- Bbrandon Delariva.
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The only reason world peace doesn't exist is because Chuck Norris doesn't feel like bringing peace to the whole world.
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If you weigh 78kg on earth you will weigh 13kg on the moon.
If Chuck Norris weighs 78kg on earth, the moon weighs 13kg on Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.
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Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats.
Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.
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Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
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911 calls Chuck Norris for emergency.
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Chuck Norris caught them all with one PokeBall.
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