Chuck Norris can check out books from the Library of Congress.
Chuck Norris has no need to walk. The universe simply moves around him.
Chuck Norris can read an eye chart with his eyes closed.
Chuck Norris made time wait.
Chuck Norris passed a kidney stone once. That stone is now known as The Death Star.
Chuck Norris doesn't celebrate Xmas, Xmas celebrates Chuck Norris.
When Jeronimo jumps out of an airplane, he yells: "CHUUUUCCCKKK NNNNOOOORRRIIIISSSSSS!" When Chuck Norris jumps out of an airplane, he yells: "MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.
Chuck Norris was the reason E.T. went home.
Chuck Norris can skydive indoors.