July 4th is Independence day. And the day Chuck Norris was born. Coincidence? I think not.
Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.
Chuck Norris takes a meteor shower.
When someone is in trouble it's a job for Superman, when Superman is in trouble it's a job for Chuck Norris.
When Superman wants vacation time it has to be approved by Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is the only person able beat a fish at holding his breath under water.
The sun cannot look directly at Chuck Norris. It must use specialized equipment just to gaze upon his silhouette
There is a plaque laid next to the remnants of the Titanic which reads, "Only Chuck Norris is unsinkable"
Chuck Norris bit a spider once then it became Spiderman!
Chuck Norris doesn't tie shoelaces, he wins them.