Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
E only equals MC² because Chuck Norris allows it too.
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over thePacific Ocean.
Chuck Norris' cowboy boots are made of real cowboys.
Chuck Norris once rode a bull threw a China shop, the only thing that broke was the bull.
Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies dead.
Tornadoes have sirens to warn them when Chuck Norris is coming.
Chuck Norris turns his game off while saving.
Chuck Norris doesn't compete, he wins.
When I was a kid, my Chuck Norris action figure broke all my other toys while I was at school. When my mom tried to throw him away, he killed her.