When Chuck Norris punches someone in the stomach they get hit in the back of the head.
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A watched kettle never boils... unless Chuck Norris is doing the watching, in which case it explodes.
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Chuck Norris can empty a swimming pool with a fork... while it's raining.
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Chuck Norris helps little old ladies cross the street...
Bad guys get kicked to the curb!
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Chuck Norris can turn on clapper lights by flexing.
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When Chuck Norris goes to the DMV, they take a number.
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Every time Chuck Norris farts a hurricane forms.
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The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there.
In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
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Chuck Norris Turns his grass emo so it will cut itself.
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Chuck Norris is the reason you turn a light on when you enter a room.
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