Coffee doesn't wake up Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris wakes coffee up.
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
I had an idea once, and a light bulb appeared over my head. Chuck Norris had an idea, and the sun was created.
Chuck Norris can beatbox with a triangle.
Chuck Norris killed the devil and is selling his own line of Picks of Destiny, available in all Chuck Norris approved guitar shops.
The world ends on December 21st, 2012. Only because that's when Chuck Norris masters the Falco Punch.
Chuck Norris can use a Shake Weight without looking gay.
A bulletproof jacket is an imitation of Chuck Norris' beard.
Chuck Norris broke the world record for most punches in a minute with one roundhouse kick.