If Chuck Norris ever got caught for speeding, he'd let the cops off with a warning.
Chuck Norris graduated college in one hour.
The square root of Chuck Norris is pain. Do not try to square Chuck Norris, the result is death.
Think of the hottest woman. Chuck Norris did her.
Dinosaurs once crossed Chuck Norris. Once.
Chuck Norris knows what Willis is talkin' bout- Bbrandon Delariva.
The only reason world peace doesn't exist is because Chuck Norris doesn't feel like bringing peace to the whole world.
Charlie Sheen is a drug, it will melt your face and kill you. Chuck Norris had two 8-Balls of Sheen and is now suing for false advertising.
Chuck Norris has 12 moons. One of those moons is the Earth.
When God said "Let there be light!", Chuck Norris said "Only for half the day."