The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme play tug a war with live annacondas.
Vote: has 41.82 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, celebrity, Chuck Norris, war
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
Vote: has 40.31 % from 46 votes. Send joke:
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Chuck Norris had six kids, they were called SEAL TEAM 6.
Vote: has 40.09 % from 27 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids, military
You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex? Because he never fucks up.
Vote: has 39.98 % from 42 votes. Send joke:
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Chuck Norris wanted more dialogue for his next movie. It was too short for release.
Vote: has 39.94 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, communication, work
Chuck Norris gave Black Ops a thumbs up and people at Microsoft a roundhouse kick in the face. Suck it Microsoft.
Vote: has 39.78 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer, game, IT, technology
Chuck norris plays frisbee with his retinas.
Vote: has 39.64 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, game
The movie Unstoppable is based on Chuck Norris' morning jog.
Vote: has 39.32 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, fitness
When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ass, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face.
Vote: has 39.21 % from 34 votes. Send joke:
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Chuck Norris put humpty dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the face. Later Chuck dined on scrambled eggs with all the king's horses and all the king's men. The king himself could not attend for unspecified reasons. Coincidentally, the autopsoy revealed the cause of death to be a roundhouse kick to the face. There is only one King.
Vote: has 38.50 % from 39 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death


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