Note to self: Don’t be the cashier to tell Chuck Norris his coupons have expired.
Big foot claims he saw Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris made a statue bleed.
Daylight Savings happened when Chuck Norris overslept an hour.
Clark Kent had to call himself "Superman" because "Chuck Norris" was already taken.
Chuck Norris once dropped a glass vase onto the floor. The glass apologized for breaking in his presence.
Chuck Norris once killed a man in New York while practicing Bruce Lee's one inch punch... Chuck Norris was in San Franscisco at the time.
Q: Why is Chuck Norris still alive? A: Death remembers the feeling of the round-house kick.
Chuck Norris gets a the highest score possible on Wii Fit by sitting down.
Allstate gets insurance from Chuck Norris, because even Allstate needs to be in good hands.