The best Chuck Norris jokes

People have near-death experiences. Death has Near-Chuck-Norris experiences.
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has 76.91 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Ghosts actually have their own kind of tv. The show that scares them the most is called "Chuck Norris Caught On Tape".
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
You know the movie, Alien VS Predator? Well it used to be called Alien VS Predator VS Chuck Norris, but no body would pay to see a fight 7 seconds long.
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris's urin is said to add 300 horse power when added to your gas.
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: car, Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris can peel an orange with his eyelids, but he rarely needs Vitamin C.
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Chuck Norris won the Tour De France on a stationary bike.
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport
Once, Chuck Norris told Nike to "just do it..." and it did.
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
When Chuck Norris has a heart attack, he attacks back.
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health
Getting your ass kicked by Chuck Norris? The only good news is you know when you will die.
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
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