When you die on Earth you go to hell. When you die in hell you go to Chuck Norris' house.
Chuck Norris has stared Fear in the face... and Fear looked away.
The hardest known subsatance in the universe is Chuck Norris's will.
If you stab Chuck Norris, your knife will bleed.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
A few guys tried to follow Chuck Norris during a light workout while he was vacationing in Hawaii. It's now called the Ironman Triathlon.
Film makers are smart enough NOT to make a Chuck Norris movie in 3D.
Chuck Norris got a homerun in bowling.
Chuck Norris once ran on the treadmil. It couldn't keep up.
If Chuck Norris were president, he would protect the secret service.