An eclipse is just the suns attempt to hide from Chuck Norris.
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Teacher to student "Why is every answer on your test 'Chuck Norris'?"
Student to teacher "Chuck Norris is the answer to all problems!"
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Chuck Norris isn't a good shot, his bullets just know better than to miss.
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Even after muting "Walker, Texas Ranger", you can still hear Chuck Norris's victims screaming after getting roundhouse kicked.
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Chuck Norris's daughter lost her virginity, he got it back.
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Chuck Norris doesn't prepare dinner; dinner knows when to be ready.
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Chuck Norris once went sky diving, he did not use a parachute.
The spot he landed on is now known as the Grand Canyon.
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Q: What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with Chuck Norris?
A: Nothing. Nobody crosses Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
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Chuck Norris once played The Price Is Right.
The prices attempted to guess the numbers Chuck Norris was thinking of.
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