When Chuck Norris comes into your house, you are the guest.
Chuck Norris' shadow stays ten steps behind him in fear of a roundhouse kick.
Chuck refers to himself in the fourth person.
Chuck Norris got a homerun in bowling.
Film makers are smart enough NOT to make a Chuck Norris movie in 3D.
Chuck Norris made Newton write 3 laws of physics just to break them... he was having a boring weekend.
The Grimm Reaper fears the day Chuck Norris comes for him.
Chuck Norris can hit you so hard your blood will bleed.
Do you know why babys cry when they are born? Because they know they are entering the world with chuck Norris in it.
You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex? Because he never fucks up.