Chuck Norris once ran on the treadmil.
It couldn't keep up.
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If Chuck Norris punches you in your dream you will wake up with bruises.
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A blind man ran into Chuck Norris and got his sight back.
Unfortunately, the first and last thing he saw was a roundhouse kick to the face.
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When you die on Earth you go to hell.
When you die in hell you go to Chuck Norris' house.
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When Chuck Norris plays Nazi Zombies it's the Zombies who build barriers.
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Chuck Norris kicked the world once, it hasn't stopped spinning.
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Chuck Norris doesn't beat around the bush, he beats up the bush.
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Chuck Norris once donated blood to a man, hes' known as Super Man.
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If you carefully examine your health insurance policy, you will see that there is no cover for "Chuck Norris related incidents".
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Chuck Norris dosn't need a bullet proof vest because the bullets wouldn't dare hit him.
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