If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
Chuck Norris' phone never auto corrects him.
Devil stays in hell because he knows Chuck is around, here on earth.
Chuck Norris once won a drag race with a unicycle.
Chuck Norris can kill you as many times as he wants to. He knows CPR.
Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin... that he built with his bare hands.
Chuck Norris can press "Pause" on reality.
When Neil Armstrong first landed on the moon he saw aliens worshiping Chuck Norris's footprints.
Chuck Norris doesn't age, he levels up!
When Chuck Norris falls over, the ground needs a band-aid