In Chuck Norris' yard, money does grow on trees.
Chuck Norris can press "Pause" on reality.
Chuck Norris doesn't tie shoelaces, he wins them.
Chuck Norris dosen't need to stand on top of the empire state building to kill someone with a penny.
Chuck Norris beat a laser beam in a race.
Chuck Norris can jump without leaving the ground.
Chuck Norris can power solar panels. At Night.
The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
Chuck Norris once played himself in Russian Roulette, and he won. No Questions asked.
Chuck Norris made a Happy Meal cry.