Chuck Norris is the greatest thing, period, despite his invention of sliced bread.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
Chuck Norris went to school so he could be studied.
Chuck Norris doesn't travel at the speed of light, light travels at the speed of Chuck Norris!
Chuck Norris is danger's middle name.
The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
Chuck Norris is in every action film ever made but sometimes he only shows up as EXPLOSIONS.
Chuck Norris can get a Black-Jack with one card.
Chuck Norris can find a hay in a needle stack.
Chuck Norris can drive to the moon... on foot.