Chuck Norris doesn't need oxygen tanks when scuba diving.
He simply sucks all the life out of the ocean to breath.
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Chuck Norris has 2 kids.
We know them as Pain and Suffering.
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Chuck Norris can make a robot bleed.
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Chuck Norris walks into a bar... the beer starts to run.
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Chuck Norris once spelled the entire alphabet using only M&Ms.
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Chuck Norris once walked into my house and I was fined for trespassing.
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Chuck Norris can kill your imaginary friends.
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The phrase "I am become death, destroyer of worlds" was actually first coined by Chuck Norris when he came out of the womb.
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When Chuck Norris tries to kill himself, he always dodges the killing blow 'cause he's that awesome.
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Chuck Norris was once in a catch 22, but he roundhouse kicked it down to to a 12 pack and literally drank his problems away.
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