The best Chuck Norris jokes

When Bell invented the telephone, there were already three Chuck Noris missed calls.
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Chuck Norris understood the ending of Lost.
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When Chuck Norris jumps from a building, the concrete commits suicide.
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Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
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Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"
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Chuck Norris found the fountain of youth, but...he wasn't thirsty.
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Chuck Norris sleeps until he tells the sun to get up.
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Chuck Norris looked Medusa straight in the eyes, and laughed.
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Chuck Norris writes on pencils with paper.
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Chuck Norris can spit through bulletproof glass.
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