Q: How many licks does it take Chuck Norris to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? A: Zero. He simply stares at the candy and the outer coating is gone.
Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
Rambo is simply Chuck Norris disguised as Sylvester Stalone playing tag.
Chuck Norris can fire Vince McMahon.
Remember the Leia scene from The Last Jedi? That wasn't the force, it was Chuck Norris resurrecting Carrie Fischer.
Chuck Norris doesn't travel at the speed of light, light travels at the speed of Chuck Norris!
Chuck Norris can make a dog bark the alphabet, in spanish, backwards.
Guns sleep with a picture of Chuck Norris under their pillows.
When Jacques Cousteau reached the bottom of the sea he found Chuck Norris snorkeling.
Q: What is the sound of Chuck Norris clapping one hand? A: Thunder.