The sun is Chuck Norris's pocket flashlight.
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Chuck Norris does not play the lottery.
It doesn't have nearly enough balls.
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Chuck Norris won a game of chess with checker pieces.
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Guns sleep with a picture of Chuck Norris under their pillows.
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Cancer gets checked for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris invented the Giraffe when he roundhouse kicked a spotted Horse in the chin.
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A black hole is where Chuck Norris ripped the universe a new one.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need oxygen tanks when scuba diving.
He simply sucks all the life out of the ocean to breath.
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Lawsuit commercials for personal injury are quite common with things like accidents and medication; however they never mention Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once pushed a door that said,"pull."
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