Rome wasn't built in a day because they didn't ask Chuck Norris for help.
The city of Dallas wanted to name a major street Chuck Norris Boulevard but decided against it because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives!
When Chuck Norris throws a throwing knife, the knife doesn't kill his victim, the force of the air did.
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
Newton's 3rd Law never applies to Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris has never received an electricity bill, he powers everything with his rage
There is only one award higher than the medal of Honor: The Chuck Norris Medal of Roundhouse. No mortal man has ever earned it.
Chuck Norris went to every planet in the galaxy. That is why there is no life on any of them.
Spider-man can crawl on walls and ceilings, Chuck Norris can crawl on water.
The world won't end in 2012, it will end when Chuck Norris gets bored of it.