The best Chuck Norris jokes

Person 1: Global Warming doesn't exist. Chuck Norris was cold so he turned the sun up. Person 2: That's bullhsh*t! everyone knows Chuck Norris doesn't get cold!
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Do you know why the Earth's spinning ? Because Chuck Norris is running on it.
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Chuck Norris once won a blinking contest against a statue!
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In some countries, criminals have the option of either going to jail or spending a day living with Chuck Norris. No one has ever chosen Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris roundhoused a guy so hard he starved to death before he stopped sliding.
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No matter how fast you run, Chuck Norris will always walk faster.
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Chuck Noris can make grapes from wine.
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Chuck Norris couldn't act in Titanic because he would have saved everyone.
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Chuck Norris caught the gingerbread man.
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Chuck Norris once pushed a door that said,"pull."
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