The best Chuck Norris jokes

In some countries, criminals have the option of either going to jail or spending a day living with Chuck Norris. No one has ever chosen Chuck Norris
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If it looks like chicken tastes like chicken and smells like chicken and Chuck Norris says it's beef then it's beef.
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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
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Chuck Norris is the only person able beat a fish at holding his breath under water.
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The sun cannot look directly at Chuck Norris. It must use specialized equipment just to gaze upon his silhouette
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There will never be a zombie apocalypse, because when Chuck Norris bites zombies, they turn back into humans.
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Chuck Norris could catch that damn acorn in those ICE AGE movies!
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In high school, Chuck Norris was voted "Most."
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The reason the Holy Grail has never been recovered is because nobody is brave enough to ask Chuck Norris to give up his favourite coffee mug.
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Scientists called it a big bang, Chuck Norris called it an alarm clock.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time