Chuck Norris doesn't buy life insurance, life buys Chuck insurance.
Chuck Norris can eat rice with one chop stick.
When Chuck Norris put his hand over a magnet, the magnet comes to him out of pure fear.
Superman's weakness is kryptonite, kryptonite's weakness is Chuck Norris.
In reality, only Chuck Norris is allowed to sing "We are the Champions". He has no time for losers. He will rock you.
Chuck Norris can hear the sound of one hand clapping.
Chuck Norris is never late... time is just early.
When Chuck Norris got stung by a bee, the Bee had an allergic reaction called Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not play computer games, he makes games play computer!
Chuck Norris is not 70 years old. At age 60, he began getting younger. This is why he is actually only 50.