The best Chuck Norris jokes

Contrary to popular belief there was a Chuck Norris sighting on the set of The Crow. No Lee is allowed to live when Chuck Norris is around.
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Chuck Norris doesn't wear flowers in his hair when he goes to San Francisco, he wears poison ivy.
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When you look for Chuck Norris on Wikipedia, it redirects you to the article titled "Roundhouse kick."
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The phrase "I am become death, destroyer of worlds" was actually first coined by Chuck Norris when he came out of the womb.
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Chuck Norris, not Duke, stole the recipie for Bush's Baked Beans.
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Chuck Norris does not need a remote for his tv for all he needs to do is just stare until it turns on.
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Chuck Norris can blow up things, without a bomb.
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Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
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Chuck Norris once bowled a 300... Without a ball... He wasn't even in a bowling ally.
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Q: Why aren't the aliens making contact? A: They are afraid of Chuck Norris.
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