Chuck Norris does not need a remote for his tv for all he needs to do is just stare until it turns on.
Chuck Norris once gave a fire hydrant a ticket for being next to his parked car.
Chuck Norris can blow up things, without a bomb.
Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
Chuck Norris once bowled a 300... Without a ball... He wasn't even in a bowling ally.
Q: Why aren't the aliens making contact? A: They are afraid of Chuck Norris.
Ed and Lorraine Warren have the doll Anabelle locked in a glass case in their basement, a priest comes there every week to whisper Chuck Norris's name in its ear. The doll locked itself in the case upon first hearing the name.
Originally it was called 'Chuck Norris Mode' but he decided to let god have that one because Chuck Norris is humble like that.
Chuck Norris once won a three-legged race... By himself.
Once Chuck Norris went back in time and kicked a ball. When it landed it wiped out the dinosaurs.