Q: Why should you never set the turkey next to the desert?
A: Because he will gobble, gobble it up!
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I think the best analogy for where we are right now is that America is Elvis Presley - the most beautiful, talented, rebellious nation in the history of Earth.
And now, you're in your Vegas years.
You've squeezed yourself into a white jumpsuit, you're wheezing your way through 'Love Me Tender' and you might be about to pass away bloated on the toilet.
But you're still the King.
China lets Chuck Norris search for porn on Google.
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Yo mama so fat that she is called America.
Teacher: Shamu, go to the map and find North America.
Shamu: Here it is!
Teacher: Correct. Now, Ramu, who discovered America?
Ramu: Shamu!
Scientis cannot figure out where Atlantis is...
Chuck Norris owns a villa there.
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What kind of cows do you find in Alaska?
Eski-moos.
Q: What has 2 arms, 3 legs, and 4 feet?
A: The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
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A woman called the Colorado State Division of Wildlife regarding a snake in her backyard.
"Can you tell me what kind it is?" she asked.
"Can you describe it?" I asked.
"Yes," she said. "It's long and thin."
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Joke has 46.20 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, geography, stupid, weather
How long does it take Chuck Norris to get to Asia?
2 months...
How does he get there?
He walks.
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