I think the best analogy for where we are right now is that America is Elvis Presley - the most beautiful, talented, rebellious nation in the history of Earth.
And now, you're in your Vegas years.
You've squeezed yourself into a white jumpsuit, you're wheezing your way through 'Love Me Tender' and you might be about to pass away bloated on the toilet.
But you're still the King.
Chuck Norris once decided to dig a hole, today we call it the Grand Canyon.
Vote:
Q: Why should you never set the turkey next to the desert?
A: Because he will gobble, gobble it up!
Vote:
Scientis cannot figure out where Atlantis is...
Chuck Norris owns a villa there.
Vote:
Yo mama is so stupid that she thinks Tiger Woods is a forest in India.
A gay American was caught by his Filipino gay husband cheating.
The American husband asked, "how did you find out?"
The Filipino husband replied, "through my Western Union Receipts."
Yo mama so fat that she is called America.
Chuck Norris once jumped. Now we have seven Continents and a tilted planet.
Vote:
In what state will you find the most cows?
Moo York.
Why doesn't Sweden export it's cattle?
It wants to keep it's Stockholm!