Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.
Chuck Norris does not go fishing, the fish surrender.
Chuck Norris graduated college in one hour.
Chuck Norris doesn't scroll with a mouse. He uses a lion.
Chuck starts the new year by roundhouse kicking the old one.
We only submit these facts so he doesn't kill us.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear flowers in his hair when he goes to San Francisco, he wears poison ivy.
Chuck Norris takes care of his guardian angel.
Chuck Norris can have his cake and eat yours too.
Chuck Norris lights campfires with fire ants.
Chuck Norris does not wear a seatbelt and reclines his seat before takeoff and landing on an airplane because he can.