Chuck refers to himself in the fourth person.
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Chuck Norris can travel a negative distance.
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Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter.
He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
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Chuck Norris can split the atom.
With his bare hands.
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The first paper money press was invented when Chuck Norris drew a design under his boot and stepped on a tree.
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Chuck Norris can stand the rain...
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In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size.
When ordering, just ask to be "Norrisized".
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Gravity is Space's way of trying to keep Chuck Norris away from it.
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Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.
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The Grinch stole Christmas until Chuck Norris ordered him to return it.
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When Chuck Norris gets pulled over he read the officers his rights.
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