Chuck Norris can flip a coin and make it land on both sides at the same time.
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Chuck Norris' beard can shave a razor.
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Chuck Norris leaves messages before the beep.
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When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive.
The zombies do.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a GPS.
Chuck Norris decides where he is.
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Chuck Norris never has a deja vu.
No scene would be that stupid to appear in front of the man twice.
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According to CNN, Chuck Norris was commanding the SEAL team in Afghanistan.
When Osama found that out, he shot himself in the head.
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Q: Why are there prairies?
A: Because Chuck Norris scared the trees away.
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During vacation my front door's open and I left a note saying "This house is protected by Chuck Norris 3 days a week you guess which 3."
All was good.
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When you come to a road that says "ONE WAY", that mean Chuck Norris is the other way.
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Hercules strangled two snakes in his crib when he was a baby.
Chuck Norris strangled a grizzly bear moments after birth with his own umbilical cord.
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