Adamantium may be hard but Chuck Norris is harder.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
Chuck Norris has a basement in his treehouse.
Chuck Norris was mauled by a bear once, then the bear woke up and apologized.
Chuck Norris once saw Spiderman on a wall and then folded his newspaper.
Chuck Norris knows what the secret crabby patty recipe is.
Usain Bolt only began running when he heard, Chuck Norris was in Jamaica shooting a commercial for Red Bull.
Chuck Norris has stared Fear in the face... and Fear looked away.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
Chuck Norris stopped playing golf after that unfortunate incident with the dinosaurs.
Chuck Norris' feminine side is manlier than the manliest man's manly side.