Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
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Chuck Norris never wears steel toe boots, they make his roundhouse kicks softer.
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Chuck Norris does not need a remote for his tv for all he needs to do is just stare until it turns on.
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Chuck Norris can fly around the world on a paper airplane.
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The Karate Kid killed caught a fly with two chopsticks, Chuck Norris killed a rhino with one.
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Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Fedor Emelianenko because he takes Fedor to the vet regularly.
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Ghost Busters call Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris found the fountain of youth, but...he wasn't thirsty.
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Chuck Norris can drive a solar-powered car at night.
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Charlie Sheen winning?
Chuck Norris says "I think not."
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Chuck Norris fell down the stairs and broke somebody elses leg.
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