Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
When Chuck Norris donates blood, he gives twenty gallons. None of it is his own.
Every time Satain goes to sleep, He has to pray to God hoping Chuck Norris does't get him at night.
Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.
Chuck Norris can build a Water Dam... In the Sahara Desert.
Chuck Norris can shut the door open.
Chuck Norris is what you get when you open a can of whoop-butt.
Hurricane Katrina wasn't the weather... it was the wind of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick from Texas to Louisiana.
hen Chuck Norris goes fishing he stands at the edge of the water and says: "Don`t make me go in there to get you".
Chuck Norris doesn't check under his bed for monsters, monsters check on top of the bed to see if Chuck Norris is sleeping.
When you break a leg it is actually not your leg that is broken. It´s Chuck Norris´s leg. He owns everything including you and your pityful leg.