Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability.
Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back.
The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming.
They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
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Chuck Norris doesn't push someone out of the way of a car, he pushes the car out of the way of the person.
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Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
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Superman is faster then a speeding bullet.
Chuck Norris just runs Superman down and keeps going.
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Scientists believe that a giant meteor killed off the dinosaurs.
This is true, if you can consider Chuck Norris to be a giant meteor.
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Chuck norris recently received a restraining order barring him from getting closer then half a mile from Satan.
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Chuck Norris inhales carbon monoxide and exhales oxygen.
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Sharks have a week dedicated to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris' sweat is used to disinfect operating rooms.
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