Joke #3904

What did the computer do at lunchtime? Had a byte!

The web isn’t better than sex, but sliced bread is in serious trouble.

James Bond got this email from a friend: CanYouPleaseFixTheSpaceBarOnMyKeyboard?

A Computer Engineer was asked by his five-year-old son: "Dad, what is Windows 95?" "Well, it’s 32-bit extensions and a graphical shell for a 16-bit patch to an 8-bit operating system originally coded for a 4-bit microprocessor, written by a 2-bit company that can't stand 1 bit of competition."

Bill Gates was drafted and sent to boot camp. At the rifle range, he was given some instruction, a rifle, and bullets. He fired several shots at the target. The report came from the target area that all attempts had completely missed the target. Bill Gates looked at his rifle, and then at the target. He looked at the rifle again, and then at the target again. He put his finger over the end of the rifle barrel and squeezed the trigger with his other hand. The end of his finger was blown off, whereupon he yelled toward the target area, "It's leaving here just fine, the trouble must be at your end!"

I never thought that the Internet was very useful, but now I've changed my mind. Let's hope your new one works better than the one you had before.

The computer programmer to his son: "Here, I brought you a new basketball." Son: "Thank you, daddy, but where is the user's guide?"

My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.

You realize that you are dependent of the internet when: You forget in what year you are. You get out from you’re room and you discover that you’re parent moved and you don’t even know when that happened. You dream only of quick connections. You open you’re interphone when you get out from you’re room so you can hear when you get an e-mail.

Once a programmer drowned in the sea. Many Marines where at that time on the beach, but the programmer was shouting "F1 F1" and nobody understood it.

Windows, the world's first commercially successful virus!