Chuck Norris kicked the world once, it hasn't stopped spinning.
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Chuck Norris once heard that nothing can kill him, so he tracked down nothing and killed it.
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Person 1: Global Warming doesn't exist. Chuck Norris was cold so he turned the sun up.
Person 2: That's bullhsh*t! everyone knows Chuck Norris doesn't get cold!
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When Norris hits the road, he destroys it.
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Chuck Norris says to rate this five stars or he"ll throw you five NINJA stars.
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If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.
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Chuck Norris once played The Price Is Right.
The prices attempted to guess the numbers Chuck Norris was thinking of.
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Angelina Jolie can curve a bullet. Chuck Norris can curve a laser.
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Chuck Norris was supposed to be in the movie Halloween but the director thought it would be kind of stupid for Michael Meyers to stab himself in fear.
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Chuck Norris once scored a field goal, using a hockey stick!
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The Grimm Reaper lost his job the day Chuck Norris was born.
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