Chuck Norris' indian name is "He who can kick your ass anytime anywhere"
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Before sliced bread, people used to say "That's the greatest thing since Chuck Norris".
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Chuck norris recently received a restraining order barring him from getting closer then half a mile from Satan.
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Chuck Norris cancelled his own funeral.
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Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure began when Chuck Norris arrived from the future and roundhouse kicked that phone booth into the past.
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It is believed dinosaurs are extinct due to a giant meteor.
That's true if you want to call Chuck Norris a giant meteor.
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Chuck Norris once raced light.
He is still waiting for it to catch up.
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When Chuck Norris gets angry, forests explode from their own boiling sap.
When Chuck Norris laughs, flowers bloom and butterflies hatch.
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When the President pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris's cell phone rings.
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Chuck Norris can check out books from the Library of Congress.
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When Chuck Norris talks, people listen.
When he doesn't, people still listen.
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