Chuck Norris has a diary.
It's called the Guinness Book of World Records.
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Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet.
The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
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Chuck Norris to Major Tom - Stay there.
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The speed of light was instituted because Chuck Norris didn't want get winded outrunning it.
Chuck Norris hates to sweat.
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Chuck Norris can see at least 3 extra colors.
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Chuck Norris was born in a house he build himself.
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Chuck Norris walked into the gold and silver pawn shop in Las Vegas.
They made a deal.
Chuck now owns the shop.
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Chuck Norris can't be in a 3D movie because the entire room would feel his roundhouse kicks.
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Chuck Norris uses battery acid for eye drops.
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Sometimes when Chuck Norris stares at the stars too long they get scared.
These are known as black holes.
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Chuck Norris doesn't travel at the speed of light, light travels at the speed of Chuck Norris!
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