The Grimm Reaper fears the day Chuck Norris comes for him.
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Chuck Norris can send an e-mail with a pencil.
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When Chuck Norris was 12 years old, he mauled a pit bull.
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Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11... a suicide.
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Human cloning is outlawed because if Chuck Norris were cloned, then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
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When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay:
"What is courage?"
He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
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When Chuck Norris opens a bottle of coke happiness runs away screaming.
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Chuck Norris douses all his food in diesel fuel and sets it on fire, 'cuz he likes it mildly spicy.
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Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
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Chuck Norris can use a touch screen without touching it.
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Once Chuck Norris met a man on a horse that he did'nt like, now we know him as the headless horseman.
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