Two halves make a whole.
Two wholes make Chuck Norris.
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There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer.
Chuck Norris is always in control.
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Chuck Norris uses the lethal injection to have a 5min nap.
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The Terminator said, "I'll be back" because he saw Chuck Norris was coming.
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Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life.
When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
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Chuck Norris CAN have it both ways.
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Chuck Norris once stuck a fork in a toaster and the toaster got electrocuted.
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The results of a recent Harris Poll on "what's scarier" forced the Discovery channel to cancel Shark week in lieu of Chuck Norris week.
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Just announced that they are changing all the days of the week to Chuckdays.
Happy Chuckday everyone!
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The only reason Godzilla goes back into the ocean is because Chuck Norris is expecting him... for dinner.
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Charlie Sheen is a drug, it will melt your face and kill you.
Chuck Norris had two 8-Balls of Sheen and is now suing for false advertising.
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