Two halves make a whole.
Two wholes make Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use OFF!
Mosquitos instinctively know not to bite him.
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Chuck Norris says to rate this five stars or he"ll throw you five NINJA stars.
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The Expendables 2 is actually a documentary film showing Chuck Norris killing people.
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Clark Kent had to call himself "Superman" because "Chuck Norris" was already taken.
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When Chuck Norris wants salmon he eats the bear too.
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One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart.
The clerk told him to have a nice day.
The next day the clerk was found dead.
The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why.
He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
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Chuck Norris had a knife thrown at him... the knife didn't impale him, he impaled the knife.
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Chuck Norris fell off a building, he got sued for breaking the sidewalk with his fists.
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When Chuck Norris sets his watch, he sets time itself.
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Chuck Norris can peel an orange with his eyelids, but he rarely needs Vitamin C.
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