The earth is rotating because Chuck Norris is breathing.
When Chuck Norris decides he wants to kill some time... it's not a figure of speech. He actually does it.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
The Animal Crackers that Chuck Norris eats are made from real animals.
The song Santa Claus is Coming To Town was originaly called Chuck Norris is Coming To Town. They changed it so the children wouldn't live in fear.
Chuck Norris can turn carbon paper into diamonds.
If Chuck Norris were an Adam's Apple, he'd be in your throat right now.
Chuck Norris' phone never auto corrects him.
There is only one award higher than the medal of Honor: The Chuck Norris Medal of Roundhouse. No mortal man has ever earned it.
When Chuck Norris lifts weights, the weights get stronger.
Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.