The best jokes about life

Two junior doctors were involved in a fight in the hospital. A senior consultant had to pull them apart. "What's all this about?" asked the consultant angrily. "It's the Tax Inspector in C ward," said one. "He's only got 2 days to live." "He had to be told." said the second doctor. "I know," said the first, "but I wanted to be the one to tell him!"
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More jokes about: doctor, hospital, life, tax
I got so fed up with trick or treaters at Halloween that in the end I turned the lights out and pretended I wasn't in. Forget the ships. My lighthouse, my rules...
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More jokes about: Halloween, life, mean, travel, work
My dotor told me: "I've tow news for U; one good and the other one bad, which one do U prefer to hear first?" I replied I prefer the good one. Doctor: "U will die after next 24 hours!" I told: "Then what is the bad newsrnDoctor: "I forgot to tell U yesterday!"
Vote: has 70.34 % from 72 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, death, doctor, life, time
Why is there a fence around the cemetery? Because people are dying to get in.
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More jokes about: life
While doing a vasectomy, the doctor slipped and cut off one of the man’s balls. To avoid a huge malpractice suit, he decided to replace the missing testicle with a pickled onion. Several weeks later, the patient returned for a checkup. “How’s your sex life?” asked the doctor. “Pretty good,” the man said, to the doctor’s obvious relief. But then the patient added, “I’ve had some strange side effects that are causing serious problems.” “What’s that?” the doctor asked anxiously. “Well, every time I urinate, my eyes water.” “Hmm,” said the doctor, thoughtfully. “That’s not all,” continued the patient. “When my wife does me orally, she gets heartburn.” “Hmm,” said the doctor, as his face reddened. “It gets worse, Doc. Now, every time I pass a hamburger stand….I get an erection!”
Vote: has 70.32 % from 64 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, doctor, food, life, sex
Could you imagine if God turns out to be a woman ? Not only am I going to hell, but I will never know why.
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More jokes about: god, life, women
Priest: Kim, do you take Kanye to be your lawfully wedded husband to love and cherish? Kim: I.. *Kanye grabs mic* Kanye: She do.
Vote: has 70.18 % from 35 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: celebrity, husband, life, music, priest
Google is setting up a new search engine to answer life's difficult and most complex questions with the response always being the same... Chuck Norris.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, IT, life
One man's hobby was fishing, he spent all his weekends near the river or lake, paying no attention to weather. One Sunday, early in the morning, he went to the river, as usual. It was cold and raining, so he decided to return back to his house. He came in, went to his bedroom, undressed and laid near his wife. "What terrible weather today honey," he said to her. "Yes. And my idiot husband went fishing!" she replied.
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More jokes about: life
Q:Did you hear the joke about the rope? A:Just skip it.
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More jokes about: life


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