The best jokes about life

"Doctor, please hurry. My son swallowed a razor-blade." "Don't panic, I'm coming immediately. Have you done anything yet?" "Yea, I shaved with the electric razor."
Vote: has 44.84 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, life
The best thing about trying to name a baby is realizing how many people you hate.
Vote: has 44.84 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: baby, life
You WILL be a winner today. Pick a fight with a four-year-old.
Vote: has 44.46 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
I know a lady who blew her man's jimmy off because he wanted to be down with O.P.P. Now he down with No P.P.
Vote: has 44.24 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
Q:Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm the school bell. A: Take These tablets and if they don't work give me a ring in the morning.
Vote: has 44.24 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, life, school, work
Life is an open door. It can be closed at any time, so don’t complain about the draught.
Vote: has 44.13 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
I weighed myself today. It is clear I am too small for my weight.
Vote: has 44.13 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, life
A demon died and was asked by god what he wanted to become in his next life. The demon said "I wish to become good in my next life. I want to be as pure and white as an angel and also have angel wings... But I still want to drink blood." So god turned him into a maxi pad.
Vote: has 43.90 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, god, life
The fastest dialog in the world: (WC door is opening) Man inside: Heyyy! Man outside: Sorryyy!
Vote: has 43.90 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
Are you free on Sunday? The director asks his secretary. Yes, sir. Then, please, use this day to rest a bit, so you won’t be late at work on Monday.
Vote: has 43.73 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life