You know your f*cked when the Asian says, "shit", during the test.
What's Mexicos National sport?
Cross Country.
Why did the Jews roam the desert for 400 years?
Someone lost a quarter.
Just got out of prison after attacking a man on New years eve.
Excuse me for getting nervous while an Arab was counting down from ten.
I'll admit that the Chinese kids in math class are pretty smart.
But doing it with their eyes closed... that's a bit cocky.
A Jewish man walks into a bar and sits down. He has a few drinks, then he sees a Chinese man and punches him in the face.
"Owch!" the Chinese man says.
"What was that for?"
"That was for Pearl Harbor," the Jewish man says.
"But I'm Chinese!" "Chinese, Japanese, what's the difference?"
And the Jewish man sits back down.
Then, the Chinese man walks up to the Jewish man and punches him in the face.
"Ouch!" the Jewish man says. "What was that for?"
"That was for the Titanic," the Chinese man says.
"But that was an iceberg!"
"Ice berg, Goldberg, what's the difference?"
School is like a boner, long and hard.
Unless you're Asian...
Why is there no mexican olympics?
Because everyone who can run, jump, or swim is already across the boarder.
A first grade teacher explains to her class that she is an American.
She asks her students to raise their hands if they were American too.
Not really knowing why but wanting to be like their teacher, their hands explode into the air like flashy fireworks.
There is, however, one exception. A girl named Kristen has not gone along with the crowd.
The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different.
"Because I am not an American."
"Then", asks the teacher, "What are you?"
"I'm a proud Canadian," boasts the little girl.
The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. She asks Kristen why she is a Canadian.
"Well, my mom and dad are Canadians, so I'm a Canadian too."
The teacher is now angry. "That's no reason," she says loudly. "What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron. What would you be then?"
A pause, and a smile. "Then," says Kristen, "I'd be an American."
What do you call an Asian billionare.
Cha Ching.