What do you call a Mexican knight?
The Chosen Juan.
Q: How was copper wire invented?
A: Two jews fighting over a penny.
Three guys (Asian, American, and a Mexican) are on a hot air balloon trying to get back home.
Something punctured the hot air balloon so now its going down really fast.
The three guys decided to throw stuff that they don't need away so the balloon won't fall down too fast.
The Asian threw away rice and said, "I have a lot of this in my country."
The Mexican threw away beans and said, "I have a lot of this in my country."
The American threw over the Mexican.
The Asian was like, "Why did you do that for?"
The American said, "We have a lot of these in my country."
A Jewish man walks into a bar and sits down. He has a few drinks, then he sees a Chinese man and punches him in the face.
"Owch!" the Chinese man says.
"What was that for?"
"That was for Pearl Harbor," the Jewish man says.
"But I'm Chinese!" "Chinese, Japanese, what's the difference?"
And the Jewish man sits back down.
Then, the Chinese man walks up to the Jewish man and punches him in the face.
"Ouch!" the Jewish man says. "What was that for?"
"That was for the Titanic," the Chinese man says.
"But that was an iceberg!"
"Ice berg, Goldberg, what's the difference?"
Hitler calls a meeting of his best soldiers and commanders and tells them "Alright I want to order the assassination of one thousand jews and four hedgehogs."
Then one of his generals stands and says "But... Mein furhur why four hedgehogs?"
Hitler then smiles and says "See? No one gives a f*ck about the jews."
You know your f*cked when the Asian says, "shit", during the test.
Three guys, one Irish, one English, and one Scottish are out walking along the beach together one day.
They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it. "I will give you each one wish, that’s three wishes in total," says the Genie.
The Scottish guy says, "I am a fisherman, my Dad’s a fisherman, his Dad was a fisherman and my son will be one too. I want all the oceans full of fish for all eternity."
So, with a blink of the Genie’s eye "poof" the oceans were teaming with fish.
The Englishman was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around England, protecting her, so that no one will get in for all eternity."
Again, with a blink of the Genie’s eye "poof" there was a huge wall around England.
The Irishman asks, "I’m very curious. Please tell me more about this wall."
The Genie explains, "Well, it’s about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick, protecting England so that nothing can get in or out."
The Irishman says, "Fill it up with water."
Just got out of prison after attacking a man on New years eve.
Excuse me for getting nervous while an Arab was counting down from ten.
What's the problem with an Asian pet store?
There's always a kitchen in the back.
School is like a boner, long and hard.
Unless you're Asian...