Peter approaches the gates of Heaven.
"Knock knock," says Peter.
Miraculously, someone answers him.
"Who's there," a voice in the distance asked.
"God," says Peter.
"God who," asked the voice?
"GOD DAMMIT open these gates!
I've been a good neighbor, loved my wife and lost my virginity, twice!"
Vote:
Your momma's like a shotgun 2 cocks and shes ready to blow.
Did you hear about the new contraceptive pill for men?
You put it in your shoe and it makes you limp.
Q: What do you call a roman warrior after oral sex?
A: Gladiator.
Are you a shark?
Cause I've got some swimmers for you to swallow.
Q. What do you call two lesbians with their period?
A. Finger painting.
Vote:
Q. What's the difference between tampons and cowboy hats?
A. Cowboy hats are for ass holes.
Yo' Mama is so fat, after sex, she smokes a turkey.
How do you know if your wife wears tights in bed?
Her toes curl up when you screw her.
Harry is better at sex than anyone he know.
Now all he needs is a partner.