The best weed jokes

Q: What do you call a stoner spilling his weed on the floor? A: Drug Abuse.
Vote: has 75.00 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: drug, weed
Q: What did the Nickelback fan say to the other Nickelback fan when they ran out of weed? A: Man, this music sucks.
Vote: has 73.52 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: music, weed
Me: "I only smoke weed because of Cancer." Mom: "You don't have Cancer!" Me: "So it's working..."
Vote: has 73.52 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: family, health, weed
Q: How do all stoner stories start? A: This one time when I was high...
Vote: has 71.85 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: time, weed
There are three moms. A Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde. They were all talking one day and the brunette says "Oh my gosh y'all I went through my daughter's purse the other day to get some gum, and I found an ounce of weed. I cannot believe she smokes weed" They comfort her, and the redhead says "Yeah, well I found a fake I. D. In my daughter's purse. I cannot believe she has one". So they all comfort her. Then the blonde says "That's nothing. I found a condom in my daughter's purse. I just cannot believe she has a penis"
Vote: has 70.45 % from 48 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, ginger, sex, stupid, weed
Q: How can you tell if you have smoked too much weed? A: You can't smoke too much weed.
Vote: has 70.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: drug, weed
Q: What do you call a pothead that doesn't inhale? A: Mr. President.
Vote: has 70.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: drug, political, weed
Q: What does a cooked chicken and a stoner who is afraid of everything have in common? A: They are both baked chickens.
Vote: has 69.96 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food, weed
Q: Why don't you see any pot heads in elementary school? A: Because they're all in high school
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school, weed
How do you suffocate a nigger? Tell him there's weed inside the pillowcase.
Vote: has 64.93 % from 96 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, racist, weed