Q: What do you call Harrison Ford when he smokes weed? A: Han So-high
Q: How long does it take before a pound of weed goes bad? A: I don't know! I've never had it longer than an hour!
Q: What do you call a stoner spilling his weed on the floor? A: Drug Abuse.
Q: What did the Nickelback fan say to the other Nickelback fan when they ran out of weed? A: Man, this music sucks.
Q: What do you call a pothead that doesn't inhale? A: Mr. President.
Q: What does a cooked chicken and a stoner who is afraid of everything have in common? A: They are both baked chickens.
Q: Why don't you see any pot heads in elementary school? A: Because they're all in high school
Three kids were smoking behind the shed. "My dad can blow smoke through his nose!" boasted the first. "Ha, mine can blow smoke through this ears!" countered the second boy. "That’s nothing," piped up the third. "My dad can blow smoke through his arse. I know,‘cos I’ve seen the nicotine stains on his undies."
How do you suffocate a nigger? Tell him there's weed inside the pillowcase.
There are three moms. A Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde. They were all talking one day and the brunette says "Oh my gosh y'all I went through my daughter's purse the other day to get some gum, and I found an ounce of weed. I cannot believe she smokes weed" They comfort her, and the redhead says "Yeah, well I found a fake I. D. In my daughter's purse. I cannot believe she has one". So they all comfort her. Then the blonde says "That's nothing. I found a condom in my daughter's purse. I just cannot believe she has a penis"