Yo' Mama is so fat, she couldn't identify a picture of her feet.
Your mamma is so stupid she tripped over a cordless phone!
How many lawyers does it take to stop a moving bus? Never enough.
Yo momma’s so ugly, they put her face on box of laxatives and sold it empty.
A bus conductor asks a drunk for his ticket. He goes through all his pockets but can’t find it. ‘It’s okay,’ says the conductor. ‘I’m sure you paid.’ ‘Never mind that,’ says the drunk. ‘If I can’t find it how am I supposed to know where I’m going?’
I wouldn’t say Harry was mean, but last Christmas Eve he fired a pistol in the garden and told the kids Santa had committed suicide.
Yo' Mama is so fat, she tried to eat her chicken pox.
What kind of a car does a proctologist drive? A brown Probe!
If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, how many orchards does it take for a lawyer?
A worker approaches his employer and holds up his last wage packet. ‘This is two hundred pounds short,’ he says. ‘I know,’ says the employer. ‘But last week I overpaid you two hundred pounds, and you didn’t say anything.’ ‘Well,’ says the worker. ‘I don’t mind an occasional mistake. But when it gets to be a habit, I feel I have to call it to your attention.’