One Sunday afternoon an older couple was listening to a holy station on the radio.
They were about 98 years old and so frail, they couldn't walk to church.
The preacher said, ''If you put one hand on the radio and one hand on whatever you want healed I will heal it for you.''
So the old woman put one hand on the radio and one hand on her heart.
The old man tried to not let the old woman see but he put one hand on the radio and one hand on his penis.
The old woman looked over and said, ''He said he could heal, not raise the dead!''
Vote:
Yo mamma so fat not even Dora can explore her.
A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office.
Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy."
When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out:
"Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children."
"Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman.
"That's very unusual.
When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker.
The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the last names."
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Q: What did one lesbian frog say to the other lesbian frog?
A: Gee, we really do taste like chicken!
A black guy was walking naked on the beach at the nudists.
He's got tattooed on his dick his wife's name WENDY.
Suddenly he sees a white guy with something written on his dick and asks him:
You have written your wife name too?
No, I'm responsible for the tourists.
So when my dick is on erection it reads:"WELCOME TO MIAMI BEACH. HAVE A NICE DAY!"
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How do you suffocate a nigger?
Tell him there's weed inside the pillowcase.
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If Chuck Norris is defusing a bomb and has a choice of red wire, yellow wire and green wire, he chooses blue.
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Chuck Norris once taught a French Bulldog to be English.
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Q: Why doesn't the skeleton go to the party?
A: Because it had no body to go with no body get it.
I weighed myself today.
It is clear I am too small for my weight.